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Relationship Change

Written by Doreen Mukwena. Posted in Family Life Inspiration

fli logoChange in a relationship takes one person who can determine to do positive actions that can bring a shift from the status quo. The greatest place to begin is to change your attitude from blame mentality and fault finding to acceptance. Recognise that blaming the other person is disempowering on your part. You can easily feel like a victim because you think it is all because of the other person that the relationship is failing. You cant change the person by blaming them or finding more of their faults. But accept that no one is perfect and that we are also at different stages of development, and so we see things differently. The bottom line is accept difference. The next stage is to choose to change the negative attitudes that flood your heart as a result of blaming the other person. Forgive them, and if it is difficulty to do so, you know, you can ask God Almighty to help you to forgive the other for the wrongs you feel have been done against you. But beyond that also open your heart for God to heal you of the hurts and the disappointments you have suffered. So many times, we end up blaming other people so much and not realise how extremely negative we have become in our attitudes to life, and to other people. SO at the end of the day, the critical change required is in you first. Once you begin to take steps to change, you will begin to see the situation and the other person differently. But the greatest work is in changing yourself. The greatest way of achieving sustainable change is giving your heart to God. In Romans 12:1-2 the Bible says, '.....present your bodies to God....., and be ye transformed by the renewing of your mind,......' This is a transformation which God does in you, by you allowing God's good and kind thoughts about yourself, about other people to permeate your heart and mind and take precedence over your hurt and wounded feelings and thoughts. Lets be working at this and see how we find ourselves this week.